Crucial Records #14 : Floorpunch – Division One Champs ON GOLD

By Tieuma

Internet is a great thing. It’s a really wonderful medium, for plenty of reasons. I’m actually part of what the reactionnary right winged frustrated people call the “Y generation”. I’m litteraly born into the internet, and it’s not a funny joke, it always has been part of my life somehow.

Funny is that internet is an infinite source of information, of laughable/useless dumb shit, of communication and of course, of insanely complexe drama, especially in our beloved hardcore scene. Internet is certainly the largest range of emotionnal content in the world.

But as we’re not here to write an essay on the multiple face of this wonderful media, let’s focus on the heavyweight champions of scandals and twisted stories, the undefeated leaders of heinous exactions, the king of affront, I’m talking about the legendary FLOORPUNCH.


As you might have guessed, in the first place, talking about this record and this band wasn’t my plan at all. In fact I was more into something more emo, more twinckling, more PC in fact, but in the light of the recent events and the new internet bursts, I thought it was the perfect time to talk about our favortie New Jersey band. And anyway, I would have done it nonetheless, one day or another.

Obviously, if I’m talking about FLOORPUNCH and their reputation, I have to talk about their most controversial record, on it’s most controversial version. Did you see, lately, those “FLOORPUNCH ON GOLD” shirt ? Funny isn’t it ? I think nowadays this record, handnumbered to 88, is selling on eBay for almost $2500 (more or less, at this point we won’t argue on the accuracy of this statement right ?). Indeed, it’s not at the point of Chunk King Can Suck It from JUDGE, which we won’t talk about at all, but for a starter this is the first hideous stuff we can put on FLOORPUNCH. Yeah, it’s not the band’s fault, they can’t do shit about eBay going batshit crazy, but it totally fits their general attitude, or at least Mark Porter’s (singer) attitude.

So first the time I’m reviewing a record on it’s physical form, on the item it is, and amongst all, I’m blaming it, because why in the world would I pay that much money I can’t ever have for a “golden” record ? But it’s one of the thing that make this band and especially this record crucial ! And that’s why I’m focusing on this first point.

I can’t neither really tell when it turned out this way, nor how, but all of the sudden FLOORPUNCH became a the target of rage and hate, and they gave it back well. Still today, they’re related to dumb jocks. They succeeded to turn Youth Crew, supposed to be a positive thing (supposed) into the most hateful and profoundly stupid thing ever, they took the tough guy attitude to the next level. And this record on gold is typically the expression of that, of this prowess, being the worst band in the eyes of most people. This record is so expensive just because of the hype there’s around the band.


Because if FLOORPUNCH is a good nineties Youth Crew revival band, with genuinely good riffs and mosh parts, what make them a so much reknown act is the hype surrounding them, their legend. The Division One Champs on Gold. It’s the dividende of all the hate they stired up.

But indeed, musically, they did a great job anyway. They actually wrote really good riffs, they had highly good idea. And linked to everything above, they shook people up with it. People weren’t only moshing hard because they had to, to prove they were though, but also because their music can turn anyone into a windmil machine. It’s literraly super motivating, and especially on this Division One Champs, with the sports gimmicks, the overall aggressive sound, way better than the next LPs they released and how they channeled anger through their tunes.

It was ambitious though to recreate a Youth Crew wave. And I can’t deny they spearheaded the late 90’s Youth Crew revival, but trying to improve YOUTH OF TODAY and BOLD could have been a risky business. Not that it’s perfect, but it’s complicated to bring something new and not sketchy to a type of music like this. But, as well as IN MY EYES or TEN YARD FIGHT, they did a great job. They brung something new. You can identify the late nineties Youth Crew sound, the sound of 97′, and on their own, they brung the most agressive side of it. In a way, there’s a “Floorpunch sound”.


Well, I won’t talk about Mark Porter’s lyrics. It’s not that astonishing, just a little bit more bitter than the rest of the bands standard but that’s pretty much it. But, as the topic is also about the fame and the legend surrounding FLOORPUNCH, I still have to talk about this special character a little bit. I think internet is the first reason why he is so famous. Way before FLOORPUNCH in fact. And I’m not saying his actions are not phony, I don’t think I’d want to meet this guy once in my life, but it’s the way internet and all the fanzine bursted out in fury about everything he did and all the arguments people had about him. I didn’t live through this time, so I only can tell what I read, or what other people told me. But wow. Just wow. The punch he threw in the face of Duncan Barlow (Guitarist of ENDPOINT at this time) was already a dumb move, but the way internet turned it all over is just amazing. Amazingly sad because it’s why now, Division One Champs on gold cost so much money, because it gave so much importance to this one guy who was just trying to be thougher than anyone else, and to his band afterward. I don’t think we will ever see another person like him in our scene ever again, and maybe it’s a good thing, but he won’t be forgotten ever again. Because internet put him at such a high level of fame, that this golden piece of wax will cost more and more every year.

This wasn’t an essay about the thing that pisses me off on the internet, nor the thing that pisses me off in hardcore. Because both are two things I spend most of my time with and that I’m pretty satisfied with. FLOORPUNCH is a band I like a lot, they are the kind of Straight Edge bands that focus on my anger and my rage, also show me what I don’t want to be, as a hardcore kid, and a person in general, and they do write awesome music. But honestly, I find pathetic to use old things that people used to say against them nowadays, without thinking about their personnal growth and how they could have changed. Maybe Mark Porter never changed, and I pretty much don’t doubt it, and also his behavior are not really forgivable as it. But before turning everything into a soap opera and bursting out loud thing that were said and done twenty years ago, maybe the internet warriors should think twice. First about who they are, who their direct surrounding is, and also about the fact it just give more fame than anything else. Pointing out others on what they say is important indeed, we have to watch on each of us for a safer scene, but not on things that were said at a different time period, especially if people took a different direction. We all change and evolve, and some things we used to say aren’t our reality anymore.



Just a little personnal foot note, EARTH CRISIS will play Fluff Fest this year, I can guarantee you this. Brace yourselves, internet warriors.


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2 responses to “Crucial Records #14 : Floorpunch – Division One Champs ON GOLD

  1. xJeanx

    So, basically, you’re internet-criticizing people who internet-criticize? That’s meta.

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